Hmmmmmm it is still brown underneath.....

Most of you who read know me quite well and know that my current weight loss efforts are central in my life right now.  As sad as that is to admit, I mean sure shouldn't it be my husband, my children, my family, my friends, my job?  But it is never the less the truth. 
Being honest with you, and most importantly myself, I've realized that at this time I need to give myself the ability to make my transformation the most important and central part of my life.  Going through this transformation allows me to be a better ____ (fill in the blank).
The most exciting thing about the (Holy heck I'm going to say this out loud) 40 pounds I have lost.  Please excuse the interruption....I'm going to stop typing and dance around the table in my best 80's Wham 'Wake Me Up Before You Go Go' way......Whew....Okay where did we leave off???  OH YES I'VE LOST 40 POUNDS :-)...Where was I again...????
Oh yes the most exciting thing.  It hasn't been that I can now take the stairs at work without being winded (over 12 floors when I go from my floor to the bottom of the parking garage where I park), or that I can now say that I used to be a Type II Diabetic....It's the clothing and the shoes.  Okay, Okay, the health thing is pretty cool but really?  Fitting in clothing that is not sold in the plus size department is AMAZING!  I haven't actually purchased anything yet but the petite department at Macy's and I did have a little sobbing session a couple of weeks ago when I realized I could go pick up an outfit off of the rack and try it on (and it zipped)!  I sobbed so hard that two ladies came to see if I was okay and when I told them my story they promptly told me the skirt was too big and got me a smaller size.  We all just about brought security in the dressing room when it zipped up on it's own.  This is all pretty funny when I realize I still have LOTS of weight to lose and the size that I tried on still had a double digit rather than a single one but IT FIT (Que Wham song for another round around the table baby!)
Back to the clothing & shoes.....
Pretty much everyone in my life, even some of the men in the office who are often clueless about this sort of thing (sorry guys) are offering advice on how what I need to buy when I'm ready for new clothing.  (I can't buy anything yet because I have this "fat woman" phenomenon known as "multiple closet syndrome".  This is when women have fluctuated several sizes in several years and hang on to all of the clothing.....I'm almost at the smallest size but not quite there yet.  The rules of the "multiple closet syndrome" and dieting are that you jinx yourself if you purchase clothing below the smallest size in your closet....) I find the advice funny because if you really know me you know I only like to wear one color, black.  I don't wear black because I'm hiding, Gothic, depressed or anything else.  I just really, really like black.  It's a thing with me.  The funny thing is that everyone (by the way I love their support) who gives me advice tells me I should buy a closet full of color.  (Que record scratching sound here......) Huh?
Yes, I'm losing weight, yes I feel like a new person, and yes I'd love to rock a bright heel or scarf at times but I am still me, and well.....I LOVE BLACK!
This morning when I went outside I realized the tree in the neighbors yard is starting to make it's spring transition.  It is shedding the old bark and starting to bud out.  I've been obsessed with this tree most of the day.  I finally walked over to the tree this afternoon and snapped a picture.  It wasn't until after I edited the picture that I realized why I loved it so much.....Hmmmmm it is still brown underneath......
So underneath the ability to purchase clothing in the petite section, the ability to take stairs multiple times a day, and the ability to kick Diabetes in the BOOTIE.....I'm still shoe lovin', black clothing wearing Rox.
Do I love you?
OH MY DO I!